Friday, March 23, 2012

Friday Five



I don't mean to only post on Fridays but it somehow happens.  I want to write about my brother and sister-in-law but that will have to wait until I'm by myself or when I don't have to immediately come in contact with people.  So here we go, another Friday five:

1. If you were free to just hop in the car and drive, where would you go? Or, if you could hop a plane and go anywhere, where?
Ireland (Scotland) or Israel.  Since my ethnic heritage is centered around Scot-Irishness, I'd love to see those beautiful countries.  Plus, I'm not built for hot weather and most of the pictures that I see of people in Ireland or Scotland are people in sweaters.  Perfect!!!

2. What's your most recently read favorite book?
Oh, this is hard because I actually read multiple books at the same time.  Currently, I'm reading A Clash of Kings and A Light Unto My Path from the Refiner's Fire series.  I love the Refiner's Fire series so it could be that.  Wait!!!  I recently reread one of my favorite books from when I was in junior high, The Last Silk Dress by Ann Rinaldi.

3. What's your favorite Spring Break memory?
When in college, every spring break the Concert Choir would go on tour.  I have a lot of fun memories from those escapades.  However, probably my favorite spring break memory is from my senior year in high school when the choir went to Disney World.  Good times.  Good times.

4. What do you put in your child's Easter basket? Or, for those w/o kids, what was put in your childhood basket?
I am in the w/o kids category so when I was a kid my mom would put jelly beans, hard-boiled eggs, usually some chocolate candy like some peanut butter eggs, and there was always a big chocolate something.  I loved that big chocolate something.

5. Do you get a summer haircut?
No, I do not.

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Friday Five!!!



Haven't posted in a while so I figured I need to give the masses something.  So here's this week's Friday Five!!!!

How many schools (up until college) have you attended, in all?

Let's see: Grant Elementary in Lakewood, OH (1); Aledo Elementary (2); Aledo Intermediate (3) Aledo Junior High (4); and Wamogo High School (5)


How many states have you lived in before the age of 18? How many countries?

One country: America!  3 states: Ohio, Texas, and Connecticut


Have you ever seen the hospital where you were born -- where is it/what's it's name?

Yes, I have.  It was a Kaiser Permanente Hospital in Cleveland, OH (not county) that is no longer there.


Do you plan to live in the same state in which you were born, or somewhere else?

Well, seeing as I currently do not live in the state in which I was born, it does not look good for living in Ohio.  Especially since my husband has never lived more than an hour from his Kaufman, even to go to college.  I'm always open to whatever including Ohio or any other state or country. 


Do you still talk to people from elementary school, middle-school or high school?

I do still talk to people from high school.  Sarah, Mark, and Liz especially.  I read a lot of posts by a lot of people from high school.  I take an extra effort to check Stephanie's to see how she's doing.  I do also talk to some people that I knew while I was in high school but that I didn't go to high school with.  My church was (and is) a huge part of my social life and I'm still in touch with quite a few of those individuals.  No one from the elementary school in Ohio and the people in the Texas elementary school are the same from the Texas middle school.  The only one of those individuals that I still talk to is Stacia and that's because she found me on Facebook.  Oh wait!!!  Not true, I also am in touch with Mary Katherine from middle school as she is also on Facebook.  I also worked with on a daily basis for 2.5 years with the little sister of one of the boys I went to middle school with.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Friday Five…on Wednesday


I meant to do a Friday Five* on Friday, but I forgot.  So today, I'm doing last week's Friday Five and I'll try to do this week's actually on Friday.  So, for your reading enjoyment, here is my Friday Five!!!

What event in the world has most shaped your worldview?
I know it seems cliche to say 9/11 but that was my generation's JFK.  What impacted me most about 9/11 was Flight 93 that went down in Shanksville, PA.  I've written a blog about this in the past, like way back.  I remember reading about the passengers on that flight and how willing they were to risk their lives to take the terrorists down.  I wondered, "Would I be one of the ones going down that aisle or sitting in my seat watching and praying?"  When I expressed this question to my mom she said that she had no doubt that I would be going down that aisle.  I, however, wasn't so sure.  Since then I've tried to live my life to become the kind of person that would wield a knife against a terrorist in a plane.

What personal event in your life is the most noteworthy to you?
I have many to choose from: my grandfather's death, my first mission trip (with the vampires), graduation from seminary.  However, I'm going to choose getting kicked out of my church.  That incident shaped me.  I saw how deceived people can be and how our decisions have an effect on others.  It would have been really easy for me to turn my back on church completely but instead I became more acutely aware of how my actions could be twisted and inappropriately perceived.  I became really sensitive to appearance which I believe has served me well in ministry.

What is something you hope to see in the future?
I hope to see me healthy enough to have children.  I saw an episode of a show called, "Obese and Pregnant."  I don't want that.  I want to be healthy so my kids can be healthy.

What song reminds you of the happiest day of your life?
It is really hard for me to pick the happiest day of my life because I've had so many.  I know, I need to cut it out, Polly Sunshine.  Without a doubt, one of the happiest days of my life was when I got married.  My dearest friends and family were there and it was just a blast.  It was beautiful, had good food, and I looked FANTASTIC, if I do say so myself.  The song that Curtis and I danced to was entitled, "The Nearness of You" by Norah Jones.  Every time I hear that song I think of dancing with my new husband and the beautiful day.

What song reminds you of the saddest day of your life? 
I've had a couple of sad days.  Probably one of the saddest was the day my grandfather died.  I won't get into the details of the day but I will tell you that my Dad-o was an incredible man and I haven't seen that many people at a funeral who wasn't a celebrity.  I sang a song at his funeral mostly because of the chorus.  I was requested to sing Amazing Grace, the Chris Tomlin version.  The chorus says, "My chains are gone, I've been set free."  Dad-o had so many physical ailments he was truly in chains in his own body.  Not anymore. 

So I guess my saddest day also speaks of happiness because the celebration of his life was incredible.  This Friday Five is a bit more serious than some I've seen, but that's ok, I dig it.

*If you do not know what a Friday Five is and still haven't picked it up from the rest of the post, allow me to explain.  A Friday Five is a series of five questions that are asked every Friday for bloggers to answer.  The questions are different each week and are different from source to source.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Heroes (not the show)


I posted this as a note on Facebook back in March of 2011.  I just found it as I was checking out the timeline format (which I'm kinda diggin').  I reread it and felt the need to post it again because it's still applicable.

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Currently, in my job, I don’t have the opportunity to do much couples counseling.  However, recently I find myself in the position of being the resident couples counselor and having a grand ol’ time returning to the counseling of my roots.  Of course most of it is colored with the underlying issue of alcoholism or addiction but nevertheless it’s couples counseling.

In a facility where 4/5 of the population is adolescent, we don’t really see a lot of people coming through that are in committed relationships, even those of us that work with the 1/5 that are adults.  Unfortunately, in my line of work I get exposed to the most fractured relationships and the most traumatic stories.  I feel truly blessed to come home to a man that loves me.

This little note was prompted by the fact that I reading my dad’s blog today.  http://www.pastordeaton.blogspot.com/ if you want to go check it out.  In his personal information on the right hand side it had a section that asked about who his heroes were.  He listed them in this order:  Jesus Christ, my dad, Dawn Deaton, my children, Jack Bauer.

For those of you who are unaware, Dawn Deaton is my mother.  My dad views my mom as one of his heroes.  I think that is one of the best things I’ve heard ever.  I grew up watching my parents model what it meant to have a husband be the head of the family yet have a marriage where they were equal partners.  It was a beautiful balance.  My mother would defer to my dad but my dad would never make a major decision without seeking out my mother.

My mother is a remarkable women, though she doesn’t think so, which makes her even more remarkable.  She did not have a storybook childhood yet instead of carrying that on to her children, she made a decision to make the effort to not do things the same way.  When the small church that my dad pastored could no longer support a family of four, my mom willingly moved across the country away from her 5 sisters and her best friend that she had since the 8th grade.  When my father got a new church in Connecticut, she stayed in Texas with two kids by herself for two months just so we could finish the school year.  She has had two knee replacements and after the last surgery was up walking around the nurses’ station THE SAME DAY.  My mom does not have a college education yet she is sought after for counsel on personal and theological matters frequently and for good reason.  She has earned the respect of people seeking her out.

To be honest, I wasn’t surprised when I saw that my dad listed my mom as a hero.  I was more surprised by the reference to his children.  I guess I’ve been a little jaded lately with my work and God led me to my father’s blog at just the right time.  I needed to be reminded of the husbands out there that lift up their wives for the heroes they are.

Especially my mom.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

The Sauna


So, since Germie has finished his rough draft of the first book in my trilogy, I've been inspired to start writing things again. I've written a few short stories in my day. I would be no means say that I am a writer, however. I just like to do it. So I found a website that generates settings, first few words of the first sentence, and then four additional words that must be used in the story. One of my best stories was written with such a prompt. You can read it by going to the archives and picking, "For the Love of Patsy Cline."

This one is a bit sappy but I still enjoyed writing it. Here are the prompts:
setting: in a sauna
first words: The stairs seemed
additional words: quench, drip, dribble, toenails.

So without further ado, I give you, "The Sauna."

The Sauna

The stairs seemed awfully steep for a sauna that catered to the elderly. I was looking for my grandmother who has walked away from me while I was trying to re-register her at the Senior Center. I knew that she loved the sauna so that was the first place that I went to look. By the looks of the stairs, I assumed that the center management only wanted the more agile of the seniors to utilize the sauna.

I started to ascend the steps when a very harsh voice called out, “What do you think you are doing, young lady?!” I turned to see a short, nicely muscled man about 60 years old. He was wearing a towel around his waist and I was praying that he had on shorts underneath.

“I believe my grandmother is in there and I have an appointment I need to take her to.” Grandmother was supposed to be seeing a therapist to help her cope with the recent loss of Grandfather. They did everything together and she was not doing well without him. She seemed lost.

“Well, you can’t go in there dressed like that. All that denim will clog the vent with its fibers.” He then pointed me towards the women’s dressing area. As I entered, I saw a bin marked “soiled” and could only imagine what constituted soiled around here. Next to it was a book shelf, most likely from IKEA, which had each shelf labeled with different sizes. Upon closer inspection, I was pleasantly surprised to see stacks of blue cotton cover-ups that matched the polish on my toenails. I was afraid that the older man intended me to enter into the sauna with nothing but a towel on. That would never do. Now I can be fully covered and be color coordinated.

I grabbed an appropriately sized cover up and changed. I took a fresh towel off of the stack by the door to the shower area and then stepped back out in the hallway leading to sauna. To my surprise, the older man was still standing just at the bottom of the stairs. Apparently he was waiting to make sure I didn’t sneak in with my jeans on. He had his arms crossed over his chest which made the 5 long grey hairs stand up. He looked at me sternly and asked, “What is your grandmother’s name?”

“Margaret Tennyman,” I answered.

His face immediately softened. It was then that I noticed the drip of sweat that was rolling down his neck to his chest. He must have gone into the sauna before meeting me at the stairs.

“You’re Margie’s granddaughter? She talks about you often. She is one of the best people. Period.”

My grandmother had been quite the burden lately due to her grief. It was strange to hear someone say that about her. I knew that she wasn’t a bad person but that she was a handful. Even the center staff would tell me that she had trouble following direction to the point of endangering herself. I loved my grandmother but I was struggling with her. And I had my own grief over the loss of my grandfather to contend with.

I mumbled out a short, “Thank you,” and tried to move past him to go up the stairs. He stepped in front of me and looked me in the eyes.

“You be gentle with her. Try to understand.”

I was startled. Trying not to show it, I said, “Yes, sir.”

He then let me pass. I opened the door and received a blast of hot air on my face. It was so steamy in there that I had trouble seeing. Then I heard her voice.

“…one of the happiest moments of my life. There she stood with her trophy hugged to her chest and smiling so wide you could see all of her missing teeth. I can see it like a photograph in my mind. That adorable blue dress with the pink flowers just made her blue eyes sparkle...”

As she continued her story, I realized that she was talking about me. She was telling the story of when I won my 3rd grade talent show. I had sung a song that my mother used to sing to me when she would rock me to sleep.

“…I was so proud that she had inherited her grandfather’s musical ability! My! Kenneth could sing! I believe that’s when I fell in love with him, when he sang to me.”

“Grandmother?”

I heard another voice answer as my eyes began to adjust. “Margie, is this her? Your songbird?”

“Jessie?! What are you doing here, honey? Dribble some more water on the stones and then come over here and sit next to me.”

I did as I was instructed and then told her, “Grandmother, you had me worried. You disappeared as I was talking to the girl at the front desk.”

The older man from the stairs sat down across from us and responded, “Kaylie is a nice enough girl but she sure can make someone drowsy from how long it takes to finish all her paperwork.”

As I looked around the sauna I saw four people in addition to my grandmother and myself. The sauna guard, who I later learned was named Ernest, a very plump woman with dark grey hair named Lucinda, a tall skinny woman with her long salt and pepper hair pulled into a tight bun named Lynn, and a small petite woman named Pearl. The woman who asked if I was my grandmother’s songbird was Lucinda.

“Oh dear, you shouldn’t have worried about me. I know everyone here and everyone here knows me. This is the safest place I could be, besides with my Kenneth.”

Everyone else nodded their agreement with this statement. Then as if she wasn’t interrupted, my grandmother continued to tell about the regional competition that 3rd grade me won with the song, “The Sun’ll Come Out Tomorrow.” She very clearly described the red curly wig I wore and how many bobby pins were required to keep in on my head over my thick brown hair. Grandmother described the glow of pride on my Grandfather’s face as he watched me perform. As she told the story I recalled how my grandfather lifted me up in the air to twirl me around saying, “Good job, Honeybee! That’s my girl!” My grandfather was always so strong. I didn’t think that anything could stop him, especially not cancer. The cancer came on so quick and by the time that he was diagnosed, he only had 8 days left on this earth.

I began to cry softly. Because of the darkness of the room and the sweat that was now pouring down my face, no one noticed.

Lynn then reflected on her sister. Lynn told us that her sister, Jane, would make the best pies and that Lynn had convinced her to enter one of them into the county fair’s contest. Jane, who loved to make pies, actually entered a pie in every category, and won each one. Lynn laughed as she shared that Jane was embarrassed because she thought everyone would be convinced that she cheated somehow.

Lucinda, who had laughed along with Lynn said, “I bet you sure miss those pies.”

“I sure do. It’s probably one of the things that I think of daily since I lost her. It’s a good memory so it doesn’t get me sad like some of the times that I think about her. What I would give to taste her chocolate cream pie again. She got the balance just right: not to light and not to dense. Oh! I think I just made my stomach grumble!” She chuckled as she rubbed her abdomen.

One-by-one, each shared a story about a loved one that they had lost. Lucinda spoke of her mother and the way that she would braid Lucinda’s hair so tight that she would have to skip recess for having a headache. Pearl shared how her best friend and she would try to convince the boys to let them play stick ball with them. Pearl said that one day her and Peggy dressed up like boys and tricked the boys into believing that they were new in the neighborhood. When Pearl and Peggy out hit every boy there, they took off their hats to reveal their true identities and it caused quite a ruckus. Ernest even shared how his wife and he used to go dancing every Friday night. Ernest said that she was admitted to the hospital for the last time on a Saturday and they had gone out dancing the night before.

Finally, Lucinda turned to me, “What about you, songbird? Do you have a story to share?”

I was taken aback. During the whole story-telling, I just viewed myself as an observer not an actual participant. Once I got over my initial shock, it wasn’t difficult to find a story to tell.

“When I was 5 years old, I wanted so badly to take the training wheels off of my bike. My dad, who was never really in the picture because he had to work all the time, couldn’t teach me. My grandfather was very eager to see me without the training wheels so he volunteered as soon as he heard my complaint. He took me to the garage and we took out my bike. I still remember, it had a pink and white basket with streamers hanging off of the handles. He got his tools and took the training wheels off. He tried to explain how to ride a two-wheeled bike but I must have made a face because he jumped on my tiny bike and started wheeling around. He looked so silly with his legs sticking out from the sides. I giggled as he rode around. Finally he stopped and said ‘Hop on.’ He held it as I got on and walked with me down the driveway to the sidewalk. He turned the bike and asked me if I was ready to try. When I nodded he pushed the bike but didn’t move his foot so I rode right over it. I fell before he even let go mostly because I was laughing at running over his foot. I kept laughing as he hopped up and down, holding his foot, acting as if I had rolled over it with a steamroller. He was always goofing around like that. Every time I take my bike out on the trails, I think of that day and smile.”

I looked at my grandmother and she was smiling. She patted my arm and said, “That was a great memory. You didn’t know it but I was watching from the window ready to bring out a Band-Aid. I should have known better. It would always take nearly losing a limb before you would cry over a boo boo.”

Ernest suddenly said, “Wait a minute, doesn’t Margie have an appointment to get to?”

I haven’t seen my grandmother look as happy as the time she spent in that sauna with her friends. All this time I thought my grandmother was retreating from the world and reality when all she needed as a place to relive her good memories. I’d been disconnecting from her as she tried to grieve and I was too caught up in the technical aspects of grief that I couldn’t grieve myself. How silly of me to think that grief could quench her spirit. True it is with great sadness that she, and I, must transition from experiencing my grandfather to reliving memories, but it’s in reliving those memories that he still lives. In that time in that sauna, I began to understand my grandmother in a whole new way. Suddenly, she didn’t seem like such a burden, but rather a comrade through a trial.

“No,” I answered Ernest. “I believe she got everything she needed here.”

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Celebrity Crushes


I know that Curtis won't be too thrilled with this journal entry but it was the only journal prompt that I found that wasn't whiney or really serious. So here it is, I present to you:

3 Celebrity Crushes!!!!

1. Johnny Depp

Now I know that there are plenty of people out there who have a crush on Johnny Depp, however, my crush originated during the 21 Jumpstreet era. I know he's all scruffy and hippie-esque now, but the Johnny that I crushed on was the young bad/good boy.



2. Sean Connery

Unlike Johnny, I find myself still crushing on the older Sean Connery. He may be closing in on 82 years old, but he's still a very...um...attractive man. Young Sean was also very...um...attractive. Not gonna lie, SNL's Celebrity Jeopardy contributed to my "love" of Sean Connery.




3. Liam Neeson. Not sure I need to explain this one too much except he is one of the nicest guys who can seriously kick some tail. Did you see Taken? Awesome. And because we all know that I love the Celts, Rob Roy was one of my favorite Liam roles. He was even incredible as an animated lion.






Honorable Mention. This one was hard to pick. The first three were obvious to me. I thought about Ryan Reynolds and Robert Downey, Jr (Carr!e has the rights to that one). I also thought about non-drunk, non-antisemitic spouting Mel Gibson. I finally settled on Gerard Butler. Obviously, there's something about the Scottish accent that I looooooooooove. I think I've...respected...Gerard's work since the life changing movie of Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life. Crush worthiness was solidified with the movie 300.

Final Note:
My biggest crush is not on a celebrity. I go absolutely weak at the knees when it comes to a certain computer nerd. What can I say? I love nerds, one in particular.
(previous two pictures taken by Aphrodite Photography)

Thursday, January 12, 2012

frustration


It is really quite amazing to me how quickly I get frustrated these days. Has my tolerance changed or do I now have some of the most infuriating people in my life? Or maybe I'm more tuned in to these negative emotions now that I have all this training.

Either way, I'm not digging it (I'm bringing that phrase back, ya dig?). This morning I cried because I was so frustrated. The tears came because I realized that telling off your boss is not a wise choice.

Bit of a confession (though it shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone): One of the quickest ways to get me frustrated and/or angry is to treat me like I'm stupid.

For my first post in quite some time, this sure is whiny. I'm just glad I have a prayer partner and parents that pray for me.

Let's see if I can end this on a positive note. This morning on my way to work, the lady in front of me in the Starbucks drive-thru paid for my coffee. I would have paid it forward for the person behind me but he was driving a BMW. I'll pay it forward when someone is behind me counting out their change driving a pinto.