"J" is for JOY

I have a couple of book ideas floating around in my head and one day I will actually put some more work into them. I have a basic outline for one of them…but I couldn’t tell you where it is. I have the introduction written for another. Again, I couldn’t tell you where it is. Probably somewhere in my office at the church that is currently a storage room (by my own doing, and I’m working on fixing it, don’t judge).

All that to say that while I am not good at making any headway on these projects, I am very good at coming up with the titles of the books that I’m going to write.

And I have another one.

It’s one of those phrases that I find myself saying and need to get on a t-shirt. Here it is:

It’s now copywrited.

Copywritten.

Copyrighted?

Copywrote?

You can’t have it!

Many people have this great idea for a life verse. “Life verse” is one of those Christian phrases that I usually find intolerable. So for those of you who might not know what a “life verse” is, allow me to direct you to this definition:

It's a Bible verse that means something special to a believer.1

I usually define it as someone’s favorite verse. Especially since it can change from time to time depending on what circumstance your life is in. Due to that fact alone is why I don’t like the term because the term “life verse” implies that it doesn’t change and that it lasts for your, um, life. I also don’t like the term because it is one of those things that Christians seem to insist that each of us have.

“What’s your life verse?”

“Oh, I don’t have one.”

**horrified gasp**

Anyway, if I had to pick one (which I don’t), it would be Nehemiah 8:10. Well, actually only half of the verse², so Nehemiah 8:10b: Do not grieve for the JOY of the Lord is your strength.

When I first read this, it made me pause. Strength? Hmm. Imma have to think about this one.

So, I did.

After some studying and reflecting (and prayer and stuff), I truly realized that I had been equating “joy” with “happiness.” They aren’t the same thing!!! God never told us to be happy. He told us to have JOY. Happiness is an emotion that is based on happenings. Happiness and happenings have the same root: Happen. Happiness is based upon what is happening. I don’t want to be emotionally ruled by what is happening around me.

Especially not in this day and age.

No!!! I want something that persists past that.

Enter: JOY³

Joy is not an emotion. It’s a fruit of the Spirit. Here’s the thing: It is easy to find happiness. It’s true! Don’t believe me?

Go take a bite of your favorite food.

Or hug your mom.⁴

Or read your favorite book.

Or watch your favorite movie.

Or drink a Dr Pepper.⁵

You feel happiness when you do these things. The hard part is making that happiness last. That’s why I want JOY because happiness goes away once the circumstances change.

But if I got JOY, then no matter the circumstance, I can weather through it.

But how do I get JOY? Ah, my friends, that part is easy, too. Since it’s a fruit of the Spirit, as found in Galatians 5:22⁶, one must simply seek after the Spirit.

The fruit of the Spirit is not just something you can pick and choose. You can’t simply say, “I’m really good with the self-control part but I’m weak in the patient part.”

This one might hurt a little.

If you are lacking in any, you are lacking in all.

You must build up your patience to build up your faithfulness. You must build up your kindness to build up your peace. You must build up your love to build up your joy.

When I say that joy is my favorite fruit, I’m not saying that it is more important than any other nor am I saying that it is the fruit that I am best at. Let’s see if I can give an example of what I mean. My husband has a couple of dress shirts that I picked out for him. When he wears the red one, he gets compliments from a couple of certain people. I think he looks great in that red shirt. I mean, come on, I picked it out. But I really like it when he wears the blue one. That’s my favorite. It’s makes his hazel eyes look bluer and I think he just looks hot. I still love him in that red shirt, but the blue is my favorite.

I love love and love peace. But JOY is my favorite.

Maybe that’s why Chewbacca mom, Candace Payne and I should be best friends.

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¹ http://www.dictionaryofchristianese.com/life-verse/

² Now, don’t get me wrong, the first half of the verse is pretty awesome, too: “Go and eat what is rich, drink what is sweet, and send portions to those who have nothing prepared since today is holy to our Lord.” However, I don’t really need to keep reminding myself that I need to eat and drink.

³ Not the Inside Out character.

⁴ Or other favorite-type person.

⁵ Man, I miss Dr Pepper!

⁶ Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-controooOOOOOL

"I" is for Interpretation

sec·u·lar

/ˈsekyələr/

adjective

denoting attitudes, activities, or other things that have no religious or spiritual basis

sa·cred

/ˈsākrəd/

adjective

connected with God (or the gods) or dedicated to a religious purpose and so deserving veneration

What I’m about to say may come as a surprise to some but I don’t believe there is such a thing as secular music.

But Denise, what about all the songs about sex, drugs, and hate? You can’t possibly say that music is sacred!

Yes, I can. It isn’t the music that is secular. It’s the lyrics. I’m a big believer in the power of words. Words mean things. I like to look up the definitions of words to make sure that I am using the appropriate words to convey what I am meaning. I don’t want there to be any room for misinterpretation. Words are powerful. A well place group of words can change someone’s day for the better. They can let someone know what you are thinking and feeling about any given situation, person, or event. They can break down a person and strip them bare. They can break a heart or help heal one.

Words are powerful.

Therefore, lyrics are powerful. Lyrics can turn a heavenly sound into an earthly exultation. They can lift someone’s spirits or deepen a depression. They can help you see the face of God or connect with worldly desires. Lyrics are simply one person’s interpretation.

The music itself is made up of notes, melody, harmony, chord progressions, time signatures, and dynamics that are interpreted by various instruments that add different colors and shapes. The listener becomes the interpreter of the music as it evokes certain emotions and memories. The music itself is sacred, but the lyrics can bring an interpretation that is not.

Let me apply this to another area that is rather important to me. I had someone refer to secular psychology the other day. At first, I just read over it and did not think too much of it. Then I thought about it some more. The term psychology is not solely a secular concept. Just because the parents of most modern theories were developed and made famous by secular theorists does not take away from the sacredness of the concepts.

For example, Carl Rogers is one of the most well-known fathers of psychology. Though he grew up thinking that he was going to go into the ministry, Rogers became an atheist and was quite evangelical about it. One of his big concepts is that of unconditional positive regard (UPR). UPR is not a secular concept! It took an atheist to tell the psychological world about taking care regardless of class, age, race, economics, or even personality.

Again, it’s a matter of interpretation. Psychology, or any kind of science, is not a secular field. It is the people involved in it that interpret it as secular or sacred. As a Christian counselor who has worked for secular companies, all I do is Christian counseling.

Does that mean that you can only see people who are Christians? Does that mean if you see someone who isn’t a Christian that you spend your session trying to convert them or just talking about the Bible?

No, the answer is no. Throughout my career, I’ve seen atheists, Buddhists, Hindus, homosexuals, transgender, active drug users, rapists, those on parole or probation, and pretty much any other category that you might want to drop someone into. I can help someone through the skills of psychology and the love of Jesus without proselytizing. I can use psychological concepts and skills from a Christian perspective. I stand firm to my beliefs and my Jesus and I allow the Holy Spirit to do His thing. I have never had someone leave my care because they thought I was pushing Jesus on them but I have had many client tell me that they left one certain therapist because they felt that they were being preached to. I can also tell you that I have had the opportunity to share my faith with a client on numerous occasions simply because I showed them unconditional positive regard even while having an opposing belief system.

Interpretation is the thing.